When my DH came home from his tour in Iraq, I decided to surprise him with some Welcome Home booty so I waited for him on the bed kneeling in sexy white lingerie holding a little american flag. He walks in, looks at me, looks down and says, "You got the red and the white but where's the blue?" Confused, he points down to my crotch -- I got my period and bled all over my white silk thong! MORTIFIED.