February 09, 2010
Confessions in Session Showing 1 - 10 of 231701
I hurt DH feelings this morning. I had a really bad day mentally yesterday, and when I called the Doc to see what to do, he told me to take a double dose of one of my meds, and a xanax. Totally knocked me out. DH said he tried to wake me up this morning, and that I sat up, pouted, said 'I was having a great dream, and you wake me up to come back to this' and scowled at him before laying back down. I have no recollection of this, but feel bad. This is why I only take Xanax when the doctor advises me to.
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I am very privately but intensely jealous of women who's pregnancies are welcome things. Every time I was pregnant, it was a catastrophe tantamount to the end of the world. No one was ever happy I was pregnant, and it's difficult to birth a child no one wants but you. I'm happy with my life, I don't dwell on it, but sometimes it stings.
I found out today that I have a clotting disorder and will have to be on heparin for the rest of my life. I wish that I would have know this before my miscarriages because they said that this disorder is what caused them. I know that I should be happy that something didn't happen to the two kids that I have that are healthy but all I can think about is that my body killed the other babies and if I had know about the disorder could have saved them.
I have a friend who keeps pushing for me to sign my son up for every team sport that is offered. After 2 years it's really starting to piss me off. My son wants to join the swim club and take pottery classes after school and she makes me feel like there's something wrong with my boy for being 'artsy' (which she says with a scowl). I think it would be best for me to dump her. My son is just fine the way he is.
The other day my son had a tantrum in the phone store and took his shoes and socks off. Instead of arguing with him to put them back on, I let him walk outside a few feet in the snow. It took about 2 seconds for him to say "Mommy, want shoes on"
Today I wanted to run away, you know like a teenager, pack my stuff and go stay out a friends until I felt like coming home....
I think I'm the only facebook user that hasn't had any drama with it. I catch up with old friends, keep in touch with local friends, and so on. But I'm also not into girly drama in real life, either.
without Effexor i dont think id make it through the day!
